The Attitude of Accountability

Being victimized and being hurt are one in the same. Whether hard-done-by on a large scale or small scale, hurt is a part of being victimized. Being hurt is to take it personally. To be disappointed though, not so much . Disappointment only occurs when you are focused on a particular outcome.

No one ever has power over another. Every person gives up their personal choice in every single instance of being overpowered. We have the power to say no. We have the power to say yes. If we feel that we don't have a choice then we are more afraid of the consequences (of disagreeing with another person) than we are of what happens by letting someone else choose for us. In this case, someone who lets others overpower them probably has low self-esteem or a poor self-image. They NEED to be liked and will give up their power in the hopes that others will like them. Either way, it's hell.

Accountability is to simply hold the belief that everything that happens to you, you had a part in creating (decisions, choices, participation). Anything else other than believing that you had a part in what happens to you is to be victimized. You create your future - good or bad. You create your reality - good or bad. You create your results - good or bad. If you believe anything other than that, you will blame someone or something else for your circumstances and results. When you blame, you are victimized.

Going after your goals is fine. But the attainment of the goal shouldn't shut out the people in your life. If it does, you're being selfish, not accountable. Being self-absorbed is not accountable. If you have a relationship with a spouse and you ignore that relationship and it goes south and you end up divorced because you were self-absorbed with your goals - you would need to be accountable for the break-up. You attracted it. You made it happen by ignoring your spouse. That was your doing.

If you're going for the gold without thought or consideration for others, you're not going to get gold. You're going to maybe get rich - BUT LONELY. If you make agreements to be a friend, be a spouse, be a parent, be a leader and you become me-me-me focused, then you're not being accountable to the agreements you made: to be a friend, a spouse, a parent and a leader. Honestly, if you're so self-absorbed on your goals, you have no balance and I can't imagine how much fun you would be to be around.

Accountability is the "ability to account" for your actions in getting your results.