There are just a few more days left until Christmas. Those people with kids especially know the joys of Christmas morning under the tree. Watching those little faces light up like the Christmas tree over their heads, they are excited, happy and thankful.
Getting gifts is great. Kids love it. But parents don't give their kids gifts with an expectation of getting something in return. Kids have no money and rarely have the presence of mind to think beyond what "Santa" is going to bring them. A parent who would give a child a gift only under the condition that the child reciprocate in return would be considered an a**hole by most people. But sadly, that is the same expectation people place on other people when they give. If you are willing to give to your children freely without expectation of return, what's with the expectation placed upon people other than your own kids?
Simply giving a gift without any expectation of return feels good. I mean, if there were an expectation of return every time you gave a gift, after you dropped a couple of dollars in the Salvation Army kettle would you expect to have it returned to you by a homeless person outside the mall doors? Let's be realistic. So why do you place expectations on other people outside of the gift-giving season?
If you serve your customers and clients, do you "expect" them to serve you back? When you go over and above what is expected for your co-workers, do you "expect" them to drop everything they are doing just to do something nice for you? Just because your customers may not fully comprehend how much you go out of your way for them, should you hold back your best effort until you get a little reciprocation coming back your way?
Giving is giving. It's why they call it "giving." There's is no taking when you're giving. There is no expectation when you are giving. If the only reason you give is so that someone else is going to owe you for it later, then you are a sad example of giving without expectation of reciprocity. Giving is supposed to be unconditional.
Sure, some people could offer more of a heartfelt "thanks" when they receive one of your gifts. Sure a client could pass on a referral about you and your service. Sure, you could be considered for that service award if someone would just recognize your hard work and nominate you. But they don't. And they don't because with every little extra effort you might think you're giving, you are also exuding some sort of "expectation" energy around you. People think there must be a catch when you do something nice - because deep down, you need to be reciprocated.
People may want to do nice things for you but not out of obligation. So, if the only reason you're doing something nice is to get something back, then you're not doing something nice - you're doing something selfish. The point of giving is to make it about other people, not yourself. Remember that fact this Christmas - and beyond.
Make a New Year's resolution to do one nice thing everyday - for your spouse, your kids, a co-worker, a customer or a stranger. Change your Attitude of Service to include "giving" as a strategy. You will find that your results in life will tend to change for the better the faster you let go of making people feel like they owe you something.
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